Intention and Decision-making

The Beautiful Garden of Rotting Endless Possibilities

 “This man began to build, and was not able to finish.”  Luke 14:30

Even as new creative projects come my way, new interests, brainstorms, lucid dreams – and first attempts at realizing them – the stark business of self-observation again reminds me that so many other life- or world-changing, half baked ideas are rotting in the room temperature oven.

The creative process has been swelling my mind these last few months: so many projects – projects that seem destiny fulfilling  and globally useful – that seem so potentially valuable – but alas, so little time.  You are a creative person, I’m sure.  The germination, the creation, the coming together of serendipitous elements to form something new – well, such a process seems like it ought to go forth on its own.  Like a wild rose, all things come together to make it and the fragrance begs to be inhaled and exploited.  Does a rose have odor if there is no one to smell it?

To extend the metaphor: we have the right as sentient beings to CHOOSE to stand outside ourselves and consciously behold our creative and altruistic endeavors as if they were foreign to us.  We seldom do this because it takes courage to look at our 'plantlings' (the children in the field of our creativity) and judge them for what many are - half grown, pest ridden, dead, dying, moldy, uncompleted, unnourished. 

Some look like awkward, neurosis-ridden teenagers that were once so cute, so polite, so attractive years before.  But now, as half-grown-lings, having been left to their own devises for the last five or ten years, what we had wished for them we now must realize will never come to be.

Even as new creative projects come my way, new interests, brainstorms, lucid dreams – and first attempts at realizing them – the stark business of self-observation again reminds me that so many other life- or world-changing, half baked ideas are rotting at room temperature.

I am not certain that the illusion of greatness or genius or anointing or charisma wasn’t a good thing.  Though I have been told I have a lot of “talents” to make good with, I am not sure I ever had the ambition or self-love or faith to make the best use of any abilities.  But now again, as I inspect my rotting garden of endless possibilities, I realize that maybe I should just let go of these children of enthusiasm and learn what it means to nurture creativity with right choices.

Previously to recently, I looked at these children through jaded spectacles – I saw creative accomplishments, writing, music composing, concretizing, quantity of texts and manuscripts, all these things as though they were out there now as soldiers of the Sabaoth working in the service of the King.  If they didn’t behave as good soldiers, that was someone else’s problem; someone was to blame, not my children, not me!  What happened to make me see things more realistically was that a friend sent me an old book – a little paperback written by a Jungian psychiatrist titled The New Man.

The author took the stories of Yahshua (Jesus) one by one and interpreted them in such a ways as to help find the self in each.  Now I am a theologian.  I have read hundreds of books by famous Bible experts on the stories of Jesus and what they are supposed to mean for our lives.  But this little book taught me, through simple bible parables, how it is possible for a person to objectively stand outside one’s self and view one’s deeds in the light of objectivity.

The primary good of acquiring the ability to do this (and I know of very few people who can or who would even try to do this, so addicted to illusion is our society), is to take the memory of it back into life and live each moment of time henceforth intentionally.  Now that doesn’t seem like such a difficult assignment, but I assure you, having tried to do this for nearly a year now, it is difficult, made even more so by the alarms your left brain sets off when you have committed an act or said a word unintentionally.

Acting intentionally has been shown to me to have been one of (if not the) mighty tools the Anointed One used to lead a life of perfect Torah observance.  Every move he made was planned, every word he said was intended; and maybe when he didn’t know exactly how to react in a particular situation, he simply began to write in the dust until the right intention came to him.

Certainly, it was through such intentional living that Yahshua’s creative ability made the lasting impression, although only a tiny fraction of his actual history is known. 

Today we say, “Make every moment count.”  People enjoying advanced age certainly see the meaning of this clearer than youth.  Yet making every moment count is still not intentional living.  Maybe a better saying might be, “Make an effort to execute every moment for the highest and best good of all concerned while at the same time knowing the difference between what is good and what is perfect.”  Even that is insufficient.  The good is really seldom the perfect.

The writer of the New Man agrees with Yahshua: that if we make this kind of realization habitual – if we get used to disciplining our lives from moment to moment – then we will never again see a garden of rotting children, for all will be brought under the submission of the Almighty through our lives and decisions.

(Please understand that I am not writing of being good all the time or acting nice all the time.  Yahshua was perfect, but he wasn’t that nice.  Note Mark 7:26ff. and many other places where he was intentional, but not nice; where he was perfect, but not friendly; where he would give a little, but no more.)

So I have been trying to become a new person intentionally.  As I said, it is hard going because your errors are made all the more obvious now that you know what your garden looks like.  At the stage that I am in the process of transformation, as intention is starting to become habitual, now right decision-making must be learned, because every choice, every interaction, every written word, every move we make requires a decision.

The same friend that sent me The New Man a few years ago suggested at this stage reading of another little work, this one about the creative process.  Like the New Man, I didn’t really get much out of it at first having read scads of other material that purported to interpret the Bible or psychology (the study of the mind) for the betterment of the reader.  The Path of Least Resistance is also an old book, very dated.  But there is a section of “Avoiding Effective Choosing” that can make an impact on fulfilling perfect intentions immediately.

These are things we do to avoid making the choice for good or right.  These not only keep our plantlings from growing, but wreck our lives.  As I read through, I noticed that I am involved in every one of these avoidance behaviors to some extent.  How about you?  Now you will see how powerful effective choosing is by listing the ineffective.

Choice by limitation is making a choice, but only the choice that seems reasonable or possible.  I wanted to be a musical composer when I was younger.  I had the stuff to become one, and still have some of that stuff.  But others I knew who were older with that dream became teachers in public schools instead.  I definitely didn’t want that.  Composing also has a very limited market.  There aren’t many starving Barry Manilows that go from writing jingles to performing at Carnegie Hall! 

My father wanted me to take over the family business.  I wasn’t suited to this, nor did I like it, but I pursued it for awhile anyway.  I made what I thought was a reasonable choice limited to only what my own limited vision could see at the time.  Choices we make when young affect the rest of our lives.  Limiting our choices to what is reasonable seems smart but certainly slices out the faith and providence factors.  It was not reasonable to believe I could succeed at my dream.  So the choice was artificially limited to that which I thought anyone could succeed at – maybe even me - that is, pouring concrete.

Choice by indirectness means choosing a process over a result.  This is especially appropriate to religious folks like us.  Do we keep the Commandments of Yahweh because we truly love him?  Or do we do so out of duty, committed to the process rather than the result?  Pastoral counseling is another trap – several believers I have counseled over a period of time were invested in the process rather than the result.  They made little progress in the overall problem but were continually enthusiastic about the sessions – probably because of the immediate gratification of positive reinforcement.  Unfortunately, we get so involved in the process that the result we aspired to is completely obscured.  (And sometimes the process seems more enjoyable than the once-hoped-for result anyway.)

Choice by elimination often results from someone exacerbating a situation to a point in which some one eliminates themselves from the decision-making process – at least they think they do.  Making a choice by elimination is still a choice that often follows with the words, “Things got so bad there that I had no choice but to leave,” or, “Personally abandoning the situation was the only to keep the rest of the group together.” 

Granted, this is occasionally the case, especially if we are not the one to stir up the emotions or opinions in the first place.  Sometimes such a choice will preserve a person’s health.  However, this tactic of elimination is used far too often simply as an excuse to abandon a project, cause or person with which more perfecting work is to be done.  It gives a personal (but false) reason why the intentional person need not be intentional anymore in a particular situation.

Choice by Default – or, choosing not to choose – every problem will resolve itself eventually.  Are you avoidance-motivated?  Take my Motivational Gifts battery and I’ll reply with something for you to think about.  For those who are trying to get something accomplished for the Kingdom, people who choose not to choose are probably the most frustrating.  I’ve heard on many occasions church or business officials say, “Though it is our responsibility, we will leave the situation be; it will work itself out.” 

There is a verse in Scripture that seems to validate defaulting in favor of the Almighty’s choice.  Romans 8:28: We know that in everything G-d works for good with those who love him, who are called according to his purpose.  Let G-d work it out.  Let go and let G-d.  However the next verse invalidates this notion.  Let me quote it from Young’s Literal Version: because whom He did foreknow, He also did fore-appoint, conformed to the image of His Son, that he might be first-born among many brethren; Romans 8:2. because whom He did foreknow, He also did fore-appoint, conformed to the image of His Son …. 

This takes us back to the will, intention and action of the perfect man.  When we default on making a choice that is in conformance to the will of Yahweh (when given the opportunity), we deny Yahweh’s foreknowledge, his appointing and election, and our conversion.  Yes, Yahshua wrote in the dust, but then he looked up and made a firm choice: “Go, and do not sin again!”

If you’ve stayed with me thus far, please allow me to continue and finish in my next publication.  If you read this far, let me know and I’ll send you a valuable gift!  LET ME KNOW!  In the meantime, hold on for the conclusion next time.

NOTES:

  1. After midnight for three months I’ve been anointed to manuscript Sacred Name psalms from the Scripture.  Now this has gone on just about every night for this time and continues.  I have nearly a hundred manuscripted and many more not yet in finished form.  How could this be?  Check the lead sheets here: www.elohymns.com.

  2. The New Man and The Mark by Dr. Nicoll and The Path by Fritz are hard to find books.  Let me know if you want to change your thinking and I can get you a digital copy.

Jackson Snyder  March 7, 2006